Lost in Buckets 🪣

For years my husband and I have told our kids that “trust is earned in drops and lost in buckets.” There have been times they’ve told me that’s not fair, but my response has always been, “Fair or not - it’s true.”

In my own Christian journey, I’ve occupied a lot of “seats” within the church. I’ve been a pastor’s kid, a pastor’s wife, a churchgoer, a church volunteer, a church staff member, and worked for a Christian non-profit ministry. It’s allowed me to experience the Christian life and ministry from varying perspectives.

I’ve known amazing pastors – men and women of God who love the Body and minister with grace and humility. I’ve seen lives genuinely changed by the Spirit of God. I’ve experienced healthy faith communities.

But I’ve also watched leaders and ministries crumble under the weight of scandal. I’ve seen congregations split and churches close their doors.

Lately, it feels like the global Kingdom of God has been experiencing a lot of “spilled buckets.” Hardly a week goes by without a story of ministry scandal or denominational in-fighting hitting the news. The public response is often a feeding frenzy. People boldly comment from behind their keyboards confidently condemning or defending the subject at hand. Even on a local level where I live in the Northeast, there are pastors burning out, leaders caught in sin, coverups being exposed, and churches splitting or closing due to systemic moral or legal issues. Ultimately, the result is that the Body of Christ is consumed with infighting and trust becomes even lower.

So, what should church leaders do when trust is lost? How should we respond when the world points their fingers and says, “See, I knew they were a bunch of hypocrites.”

Be Hopeful

Don’t be discouraged by the media reports. For every church scandal you see on the news there are thousands of other good churches and wholesome pastors doing the work of the ministry. As leaders it can be easy to feel like Elijah when Jezebel was out to kill him (1 Kings 19). We start to think, “I am the only one left!” In these moments, if we let Him, the Lord is near and wants to remind us that we’re not fighting the good fight alone – there are others who are still faithfully serving Him with clean hands and pure hearts.

Be Approachable

Be humble, honest, and transparent. Let your congregants and team members ask questions and stay open and approachable to their inquiries. As leaders, we are asking our team and church members to give of their time, talents, and resources, so we should make room for their questions. We shouldn’t take it personally if they ask about how the church’s money is spent, or the way decisions get made. Letting them in on our policies and processes goes a long way in earning (or rebuilding) trust. Transparency protects leaders, team members, and churchgoers alike.

Be Sensitive

Church hurt is real, and many people who walk through our doors on a Sunday morning have experienced hurt or disappointment at the hands of spiritual leaders. It isn’t as simple as telling them to forgive and move on. Abuse and trauma - especially when committed within the walls of the church – can be life-altering. Many people don’t recover and simply walk away from their faith altogether. If a person is courageous enough to attend church again, we need to shepherd their souls with care. We should never minimize their experiences or their pain. Instead, our churches and leadership should be an instrument of healing in their lives.

Be Safe

Churches should be the safest places in our communities – both for attendees and staff members. Establish policies regarding background checks for volunteers and staff. Have mandated reporting procedures and ensure you protect those who come forward by having a structure for whistleblower response. How we handle these things should be above reproach, and we should willingly go above and beyond what the law requires to keep our people safe.

Note: Please contact us if you have any questions about implementing these types of procedures in your church. We would be more than happy to support your church in adding these.

Be Wise and Discerning

If you’re on a church staff and something feels “off” don’t ignore the red flags. If you’re aware of sin, abuse, or coverups happening at your church don’t stay quiet. Speaking up isn’t the same as gossip. Turning a blind eye to these things might feel like the loving or gracious thing to do, but it often leads to more trouble down the road. Find a trusted leader or friend and have truthful conversations, and then, if you need to, be willing to move on and find a new faith community. Romans 12:18 says, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” So, release forgiveness, walk in truth, and leave in peace.

Some Final Thoughts

If I’m honest, there are days when I wonder if ministry is worth it or if my time would be better spent doing other things. What if I just followed Jesus and left this whole “church” thing behind? Then I return to Scripture to see what Jesus had in mind for His Church and, in doing so, I re-learn what the Christian life is supposed to look like.

Humility. Grace. Love. Sacrifice. Surrender.

These are the marks of the followers of Jesus. This side of heaven there is no “perfect” church, but we can keep running the race set before us. Being faithful to the end, let’s help rebuild trust that is often lost in our churches one drop at a time.

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.”

Galatians 6:9-10

Alicia Osgood

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